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</script><link rel="stylesheet" href="/css/minimal.css"/><script src="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/npm/pace-js/pace.min.js"></script><div id="sidebar"><div id="menu-mask"></div><div id="sidebar-menus"><div class="avatar-img is-center"><img src="/img/avatar.png" onerror="onerror=null;src='/img/friend_404.gif'" alt="avatar"/></div><div class="site-data is-center"><a href="/archives/"><div class="headline">文章</div><div class="length-num">22</div></a><a href="/tags/"><div class="headline">标签</div><div class="length-num">21</div></a><a href="/categories/"><div class="headline">分类</div><div class="length-num">2</div></a></div><div class="menus_items"><div class="menus_item"><a class="site-page" href="/"><i class="fa-fw fas fa-home"></i><span> 主页</span></a></div><div class="menus_item"><a class="site-page" href="/tags/"><i class="fa-fw fas fa-tags"></i><span> 标签</span></a></div><div class="menus_item"><a class="site-page" href="/categories/"><i class="fa-fw fas fa-th"></i><span> 分类</span></a></div><div class="menus_item"><a class="site-page" href="/archives/"><i class="fa-fw fas fa-archive"></i><span> 归档</span></a></div></div></div></div><div class="post" id="body-wrap"><header class="post-bg" id="page-header" style="background-image: url(/img/cover.jpg);"><nav id="nav"><span id="blog-info"><a class="nav-site-title" href="/"><span class="site-name">時痕</span></a><a class="nav-page-title" href="/"><span class="site-name">年终总结 - 2023 至 2024</span></a></span><div id="menus"><div class="menus_items"><div class="menus_item"><a class="site-page" href="/"><i class="fa-fw fas fa-home"></i><span> 主页</span></a></div><div class="menus_item"><a class="site-page" href="/tags/"><i class="fa-fw fas fa-tags"></i><span> 标签</span></a></div><div class="menus_item"><a class="site-page" href="/categories/"><i class="fa-fw fas fa-th"></i><span> 分类</span></a></div><div class="menus_item"><a class="site-page" href="/archives/"><i class="fa-fw fas fa-archive"></i><span> 归档</span></a></div></div><div id="toggle-menu"><span class="site-page"><i class="fas fa-bars fa-fw"></i></span></div></div></nav><div id="post-info"><h1 class="post-title">年终总结 - 2023 至 2024</h1><div id="post-meta"><div class="meta-firstline"><span class="post-meta-date"><i class="far fa-calendar-alt fa-fw post-meta-icon"></i><span class="post-meta-label">发表于</span><time class="post-meta-date-created" datetime="2024-12-31T17:15:49.000Z" title="发表于 2025-01-01 01:15:49">2025-01-01</time><span class="post-meta-separator">|</span><i class="fas fa-history fa-fw post-meta-icon"></i><span class="post-meta-label">更新于</span><time class="post-meta-date-updated" datetime="2025-05-16T05:33:36.408Z" title="更新于 2025-05-16 13:33:36">2025-05-16</time></span><span class="post-meta-categories"><span class="post-meta-separator">|</span><i class="fas fa-inbox fa-fw post-meta-icon"></i><a class="post-meta-categories" href="/categories/%E6%9D%82%E6%80%9D/">杂思</a></span></div><div class="meta-secondline"><span class="post-meta-separator">|</span><span class="post-meta-wordcount"><i class="far fa-file-word fa-fw post-meta-icon"></i><span class="post-meta-label">总字数:</span><span class="word-count">1.5k</span><span class="post-meta-separator">|</span><i class="far fa-clock fa-fw post-meta-icon"></i><span class="post-meta-label">阅读时长:</span><span>4分钟</span></span><span class="post-meta-separator">|</span><span class="post-meta-pv-cv" id="" data-flag-title=""><i class="far fa-eye fa-fw post-meta-icon"></i><span class="post-meta-label">浏览量:</span><span id="busuanzi_value_page_pv"><i class="fa-solid fa-spinner fa-spin"></i></span></span></div></div></div></header><main class="layout" id="content-inner"><div id="post"><article class="post-content" id="article-container"><p>是因为太久没有写过叙事风格的文字，还是因为脑子早已经被快节奏的短视频侵蚀，又到了年末回顾的时候，我竟与面前的电脑周旋了一晚，最后愣是一句能读的话都没有写出来。末了，把写不出东西这个毛病归结于家里的环境缺乏情调，次日专门找了个海边的图书馆来写，结果到了太阳都下山了，才想起来自己此行的正事不是来这儿看书，而是写点什么。倒是歪打正着，好不容易来一趟，总得在关门之前写下点什么，遂匆匆留下此篇，作为我过去两年存在过的痕迹。</p>
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<p>2024 年的终曲轻轻落幕，与我二十一和二十二岁的许多事情一样，没有轰轰烈烈的收场，只是在那某一瞬间突然意识到，过去的时光就这么结束了。</p>
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<p>是什么时候开始觉得时间过得很快的呢？<br>是那一天想喝家门口的喜茶，却发现它几个月前就已经搬走的时候吗？<br>是那个实习结束后的早晨伸着懒腰起床，打开手机看见日历上赫然写着 10 月的时候？<br>是考完研的那天午后，抱着沉沉的资料最后一次走出图书馆的瞬间？<br>是意识到自考研后又已经过去了两个 75 天的那天？<br>还是一转眼发现就连 2024 都已经过完的今天？</p>
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<p>已经记不太清了。<br>只觉得像是一个阳光灿烂的下午，躺在阳台上被太阳晒得暖暖的椅子里眯上了眼睛。在梦里，时间很慢，慢到周一到周五的时间像有一个学期那么长，床头的耳塞堆成了小山，书页翻得泛黄。醒来的时候，冬日的阳光还照在脸上，窗外的鸟儿还在叽喳，楼下的商铺喇叭还播着广告，对面小区的女人也还在遛她的狗，一切都好像没变。只是家里客厅的台历不再写着 2023，楼下不再有开了两年的排骨饭，对面小区的萨摩也再没看到了。</p>
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<p>马尔克斯说，“生活不是我们活过的日子，而是我们记住的日子，我们为了讲述在记忆中重现的日子”。</p>
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<p>2023 与 2024 ，是 “寻找” 的两年。</p>
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<p>我去实习，去工作，去寻找那个从小就向往的大人的世界，去争取那个看起来还算不错且稳定的生活。而我同时害怕，害怕未知带来的不确定性，便又去逃避，去考研，去努力开拓那条曾经未曾想过的道路。为了毕业，我还去试着做了一些研究，去学习，去尝试在未曾涉足的学术领域中寻找自己的兴趣与潜能。</p>
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<p>寻找是创造的过程，但也因此注定是选择与放弃的过程。过去的这两年里，我时常会想到一首诗：</p>
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<p>黄色的树林里分出两条路，<br>可惜我不能同时去涉足，<br>我在那路口久久伫立，<br>我向着一条路极目望去，<br>直到它消失在丛林深处。<br>但我却选了另外一条路，<br>它荒草萋萋，十分幽寂，<br>显得更诱人、更美丽，<br>虽然在这条小路上，<br>都很少留下旅人的足迹，<br>虽然那天清晨落叶满地，<br>两条路都未经脚印污染。<br>啊，留下一条路等改日再见！<br>但我知道路径延绵无尽头，<br>恐怕我难以再回返。<br>也许多少年后在某个地方，<br>我将轻声叹息把往事回顾，<br>一片树林里分出两条路，<br>而我选了人迹更少的一条，<br>因此走出了这迥异的旅途。</p>
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<p>还记得在发出放弃考研录取邮件的那个下午，我仿佛就站在这样的岔路口前，极目远眺。我很明白，这不同于我过去二十年人生中的许多选择，这一次没有明确的答案，也没有周旋的余地。</p>
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<p>第一次，我意识到，放弃并非选择的反面，而是彼此纠缠，同时发生的一对结果。选择了一条路，便意味着永远失去了踏足那另一条的权利。</p>
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<p>最终按下发送键的那一刻，我恍惚间感到，那些考研的日子似乎就像写满了字的旧报纸，在刹那间被撕得稀碎。</p>
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<p>过去的日子，就一文不值了吗？我问自己。</p>
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<p>想起学马原时徐涛老师对认识的反复性和无限性的讲解：人的认识能力是不断提高的，有的我们认知的局限性决定了我们没有办法看到事物的本质。</p>
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<p>可以说，是考研的过程改变了我，是这些日夜饱满了我的人生和我的经历，从而让我能够更清醒地认识我所想要的人生到底是什么样的。也就是说，宣告考研死亡的不是我，当我下定决心开始的时候，它就注定是会灭亡的。是那些日夜带给我的，最终否定了它们自己。</p>
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<p>虽然，此生再无机会走上那未曾走过的路，但那些为之准备的日夜，我想，将会化作我的行囊，带着我走向路的更深处。</p>
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<p>那，选择另一条路，就会更好吗？</p>
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<p>我永远也不会知道，在平行世界里，选择另一条路的自己，到底会不会过得更好。但可以肯定的是，在往后的日子里，在现在的道路上，我会好好过。</p>
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<p>2025，向前走，别回头。</p>
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